A discussion about sales, sales tips and advice, and about those who land the deal

In case you haven't noticed while visit blogs here at Know More Media, we're looking for stuff.  Lots of stuff.  We're looking for sponsors for our blogs (I'll get you a screamin' deal if you sponsor ours.  We'll talk later.)  And we're looking for feedback from you, our valued reader.  That's what that huge, blue banner is at the top of our blog. 

Me?  I don't think its big enough, personally.  And I'm disappointed it isn't flashing or vibrating.  I like moving, shiny things.

OK, back on topic.  My purpose here is simple: Offer some critique and friendly analysis on the "big blue ads" we're seeing on the blogs of KMM.

First up, this one...

My grade: B-   Why?  Mainly because while it does get your attention, I have to ask myself as the "customer" in this little transaction, "Why should I help this freakin' blog?  Why do they need 'help'?"  It just doesn't grab me and compel me to click.

Next up...

My grade: C-    The words "quick" and "survey" have about as much in common as the words "friendly" and "wolverine".  No survey is quick.  Not this one, not any one.  And it would be nice if they asked nicely...instead, they command me to do it.  Well ya know what?  I'm not gonna!  So there!...Whatta ya think of that, you ad bully!

Next up...

My grade: D+   This is the "space saver" version of the previous ad.  Instead of the command to "complete" the survey, this one just announces it.  But the problem remains...the whole thing about grouping the words "quick" and "survey" in the same sentence.

Finally, the mother of all big blue banner ads...

My grade: B+   Why such a high mark?  It's got balls (excuse the terminology).  Complete and utter honesty from the advertiser.  But is it something readers (our customers) will get excited about? 

"Hey look, honey!  If I complete a quick readership survey, advertisers will pay these guys more money!"  Yup, that'll do it.  Actually, the thing that I don't like about this particular ad is that it has kind of "big brother" feel to it (the creepy "big brother" from that weird novel, not the wild and crazy "Big Brother" on CBS).  "If they know more about me, they get more money??"  RUN!  Before they suck our brains out!

So what kind of ads would get people to click and give their information?  Good question.  I've conducted some scientific research on that very subject, and I've found that banner ads must include this picture to ensure high clickability:

Or, it must contain one of these key catch-words:

• Cialis
• Viagra
• Nigerian banking reward
• Free dinner from Chili's
• Natural
• Male
• Enhancement

If a banner ad doesn't contain one of those words, it won't get clicked.  Plain and simple.

The ad, then, should look something like this:

 "Click here to enhance our blog.  That's hot."

What can I say...they should have come to me first to create their ad sales campaign.

Now, in all seriousness, let me say that the staff at Know More Media is wonderful from top to bottom, and its a pleasure working with them and helping to build their network through my humble writing efforts.  Please do complete the survey (I did...its kind of fun, and not that long) and it does help the cause. 

And, sponsor our blog.  I'll give you so many plugs you'll think you've undergone hair replacement treatment.